“Be strong enough to stand alone, smart enough to know when you need help,
and brave enough to ask for it.” Ziad K. Abdelnour
Today is ‘Work On It Wednesday’ and the coaching tip I am offering is… “Ask for help!” It’s funny, even writing that I worry some will read it and stop right there, thinking I am talking to those who are lost in a huge foothold. WELL, no sir ‘e 🙂 I am talking to you, and me. We all have times where we simply should call on others for help. We should call on a friend, a loved one, or someone God has gifted in the area we need help with.
Maybe asking why we avoid asking for help is a great place to start. Let’s look at a few questions I ask my coaching clients to think on and to rule out. I find this works really well because it helps us see where OUR weakness may be. Asking for wise counsel or assistance is strong, smart, and brave. Think about something that is overwhelming right now. Something you wish you could get done but you are stressing about it or putting it off, and ask yourself these questions.
Do you feel that if you ask for help you will then need to reciprocate?
We sometimes avoid help thinking we might not be able to return the favor and we’ll end up feeling more stress. What if we don’t want to return the favor? These are good questions but they need some thought. We should only return favors that land in our wheelhouse. We need to be clear about offering help back. Know going into it just what you would be willing to do in the- so to speak ‘trade’ of services.
Do you feel asking for help is a sign of weakness or shows a lack of capability?
You really don’t need to know how to do it all. However, if you want to get it done and done well, then you will need to call on the troops. This is all about gifts and talents. Know yours and stay in your lane. Let those with gifts in their areas help you. It’s all about the result you need, not who performs the skill needed to get your result.
Do you feel by asking for help you will lose control of the situation?
Who told you that? Delegating is a beautiful thing. YOU DON’T want control over everything. GOD has control in the first place. We truly get it wrong when we THINK it is us doing all the work. So really if we believe in God’s ALMIGHTY then we know it is Him doing the work through either us or the individual that we will call on for help. Either way, we need to really think about the ‘control’ we so desire and if we truly want that control 🙂
Do you feel that by asking for the support of others, you are burdening them?
I have to tell you here… do a trade. EVERYONE has something they hate doing and other things they love doing. We know that doing work that is within our God-given gifts and talent is simple, fun, and energizing. Find someone who works perfectly opposite of you. You will both benefit.
Do you feel you are the only one who can do it ‘your way-the right way’?
Another little dose of humble pie here. Get over it- if you are struggling to accomplish something – it most likely isn’t in your gifts and talents and someone most likely will do FAR better than you could even dream of. So go ahead and see. Let them know what you hope for and let them use their God-given talent… and see how awesome of a job they can do. It will make them feel great and you most likely will have your socks knocked off!
When Moses’ father-in-law saw all that Moses was doing for the people, he asked, “What are you really accomplishing here? Why are you trying to do all this alone while everyone stands around you from morning till evening?” Exodus 18:14-15
Be STRONG – SMART – BRAVE… ask for help when needed 🙂
Faith Infused Living… Reaching Goals Higher!
Niccie Kliegl CLC, RN
Author of Awaking the Living Legacy