Niccie Kliegl, Guilt, shame

After my last talk show on self-love and learning to see ourselves and others through Godly eyes (‘Perfectly Imperfect’) I got a few messages about guilt and shame. Thank you, dear sisters and brothers, for being daring enough to speak up and share how guilt and shame get in the way of your self-love.

Two things are written on my heart. Live in and with the Spirit… and fully surrender to the power already done by Jesus himself, for YOU.  Oh, I know, it sounds so simple on paper. Yet, it truly is not. Here are a few tips I could share on HOW to live in the Spirit and how to surrender to the work Jesus has already done for us.

  1. Rest on the fact that God does not relive, replay, and dwell on our sins. His focus is on our relationship with Him. AND He knows we will be closer to Him and better able to serve Him if we are free of the footholds that sin can put on our lives. He wants us living in this free place for His sake too…

Isaiah 43:25  “I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more.

God has a call on each of our lives. What is He asking of you, of me? Is Satan getting in the way of us doing great work for the kingdom by keeping us in a place of guilt and shame? Think about a past sin that you relive, or replay in your mind. Now humor me…

How could you have lived your life differently if it had never happened?
What could you have accomplished?

No, we can’t take it away…we already it.  “WE” can’t take it away…but Jesus can…and did.

So God isn’t wiping the act away from history… He is wiping away the SIN from the very actions of our history. You can and should remove the sin from the act, that is the key for us. This is how you forgive others. You one day accept the person but move away from the sin. Can you do that for yourself? Can you grace yourself with the same level of grace you give others?

Think of some of the painful things others have done to you. Yet somehow, you still love and accept them. Do the same for yourself. Own up to the painful things you have done… but accept and love yourself – separately from the sin. Jesus died on the cross for you to live freely…no longer bound to that sin…


2.   Replace the space. One thing I am learning with such conviction is that we need to fill back up. Honestly. If you have a place that has been consumed by sin, guilt, and shame…Either crowd it out with love, truth, and light… Or, let go of it and be very mindful to fill that space back up with all things good.

Colossians 3:12-15  Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. 15 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.

This is honestly a place where many of us slip backward. We do accept Christ and all he has done for us. We feel it and are so grateful. We do forgive ourselves and others…and then we are bummed and hurt when all the muck returns.


This is a game changer for me. Absolutely surrender to Christ. Let the great work he has done soak in and then get busy filling up with his grace and love. Do this for others too. Unite yourself with God the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit just as you should unite with one another in love through all three.

  • Get into truth and light. (By music, the written word, sermons, Bible studies…)
  • Surround yourself with wise counsel. (Friends, colleagues, advisors who speak and act in love and truth.)
  • Move forward in what God is asking of you. (Ask…seek…knock.)
  • Shout praises of gratitude. (As you do the items listed above you will recognize it wasn’t you alone…So as you see growth and success do not own it as yours alone. Give God His due glory. This helps you to see His power in your life. This increases your faith and will lead to bolder moves, greater impact, and growth.)


Romans 8:1  Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,

Fully surrender and live in the Spirit my friends!

Niccie Kliegl


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